Friday, 8 April 2011

"Hans"

The old wooden floor creaked underfoot as Brady made her way down the hall. The bags under her eyes drooped heavily and her achy bones barely got her up the stairs. She made it to her bed, however, and dropped onto the mattress. She engulfed herself in the silk sheets, and slowly drifted off into peaceful slumber.

There he was, lying still on top of a very small bed. The bedding was crisp and white, not bothered by this stiff body. Breaths and mutters filled the stuffy air. The man could barely move, but his eyes showed all of his emotions. They moved back and forth, up and down, worried and confused. He was still in his military uniform; He must have forgotten to take it off after his return from the hospital. Propped up on the bedside table was his army identification card. It read: "Hans Zimmer, Infantry Unit # 41". His body seemed so old and used. It looked like a child's toy that had been fooled around with for too many years. Underneath the creme bed sheets was a secret. A secret that Hans was hiding from his family, the world, but most of all, himself.

The sunlight shone through a crack in window blinds. Brady's eyes opened reluctantly as she turned her head to the clock. 7:41 AM. She sighed, pulled the duvet cover atop her head and relaxed once again.

Hans lifted his blankets hesitantly and peered at his feet. Foot, rather. There was only one. As soon as Hans saw this, it all started to come back to him. He began recalling the events he had undergone in the hours before. It was late afternoon and the rain was coming down hard. Big drops fell from the sky like hail, painful and icy cold. Hans had gotten too close to a small fire burning a small family home. The fire had traveled towards to kitchen appliances, and once interacting with the gas particles in the stove, there was an explosion. Hans shuddered at the thought. His vague memories are the only thing that connect him to the real world. He used to be a respected soldier with a high ranking, and now he has become a useless amputee carrying nothing but reminiscences. 

 Her body stretched out as she awoke slowly. Brady licked her lips and expanded her sore knuckles. Her sleep had been short and non-fulfilling, and she longed for a more serene rest. Perhaps the following evening would assure her more shut-eye. With positive thoughts in mind, Brady rose from her bed and smiled. Her beautiful April day had just begun.

1 comment:

  1. Brady, awesome story.

    Sadly, I can't pay much attention to rhyme scheme, but I CAN comment on conventions used, and the aesthetic.

    Brady, honestly, I`m not usually a fan of the dream within a dream concept. But I accept it here since this is your (imagined) real-life alter ego. Furthermore, I wonder if you`re familiar with the living Hans Zimmer? He is a composer who's scored films such as The Dark Knight and Gladiator.

    I really appreciate how the writing style changes from when you're talking about yourself and to when you're talking about Hans. Brady's sections are written in a care-free fashion, while Hans' is written in a much darker way.

    Lastly, do you have any idea what war Hans fought in? Just wondering.

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